Naruto Role-Play |
Don't forget to read the rules, banned Jutsu list, and news guys. Stay up-to-date! Mind the Moderators and Admins in the CB- we do enforce our rules everyone. Okay everyone, Re-post your finished and graded characters in Graded Characters. Read the topic "Explanation" as well, please! Have a comment or suggestion? PM one of the Moderators, who will show it to the Administrators. Remember, Moderators are your bridge to the Admins! |
Top posting users this week | |
|
| I Declare I guess | |
| | Author | Message |
---|
Aionrap
Posts : 100 Join date : 2013-11-24
| Subject: I Declare I guess Fri Nov 29, 2013 1:16 am | |
| Since everyone else is doing it, I don't want to be left behind.
Name of Character: Emilio Nagasaki
Date: 11/28/2013
Current rank: Genin
I declare to be tested to be a Chunin or however this thing goes. Test Away, I guess. | |
| | | Corren Admin
Posts : 181 Join date : 2013-11-19 Age : 29 Location : Behind you.
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:05 am | |
| Mmkay, Emilio. I'll make this a decent test. Remember, you are here to offer and advertise to the Admins your general advancement from basic RP and literary efficiency to advanced and above-average proficiency.
We will be looking for:
- Above average grammar
- Above average sentence phrasing
-Above average understanding of RP
- Intellectual literary prowess
- Unique writing style
- Obvious advancement from previous level of skill
Here is your test.
Emilio happens to awake upon a small wooden raft in the ocean; land hides beyond the horizon, not even enhanced visual prowess could detect the nearest spot of earth. Emilio has a box of edibles, and a large jug of fresh water. Each will last him estimate three days if conserved. Land will not be visible until two weeks of drifting. Even if constantly propelled, the raft will not reach land in time to survive starvation or dehydration. No one will see any form of signaling. Also, there are ravenous creatures within the water that constantly harass Emilio, attempting to kill him. They are ranging in size, and generally appear to be sharks with limbs. They range from two feet to ten, the larger being rare.
CHALLENGE: Detail Emilio's strife for survival and how he deals with the threat of these aquatic creatures. He cannot be helped by anyone. All other details fall to you.
Must be 2,000 words minimum. | |
| | | Aionrap
Posts : 100 Join date : 2013-11-24
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Fri Nov 29, 2013 3:23 am | |
| "Mmmmm, another hectic dream." Emilio thought to himself, as he yawned and tried to focus his orbs called eyes on his ceiling. The only problem was, there was no ceiling. Nope. Completely removed, but what there was, was the smell of sea salt and the gently call of the ocean. "What the hell!?"His body shot upward and alert, like that of a prairie dog's. "The sea . . . and raft . . . wait what is this?" He was surely under a Genjutsu of some sort, but why? "Pain or disruption of the senses dispels Genjutsu, lets seeeee." His tool pouch was still conveniently on the back of his hip, all ways there in a time of need. Producing a single sharp blade kunai, Emilio pondered where to cut. Nothing to major, for if the illusion was real he could be screwed, so he decided and open palm cut. Not too deep, so his hand would still function when needed, but also with a slow pace to really draw out an involuntary squeal of agony.
As the thick crimson liquid quickly enveloped and found refuge of his palm, he jammed the kunai into the wooden raft he was station on. "Son of a Bitch!" The boat rocked slighty from the implanted kunai, but he didn't care, his mind was only set on nursing the fresh wound. Not completely pointless, for now he was sure this was reality.
Removing his orange sash from his mid-drift, he slid it towards the implanted kunai. Indeed a handy mechanism, but that was to be oooed and awed at later. Wrapping a piece of the now cut cloth around his hand, he had the pressure he needed to slow and eventually stop the bleeding.
"Whew, now that that is settled, lets see what we have here." His eyes scanned around the wooden raft. Against the sail of the raft, tied up were a bit of supplies. He further inspected and saw they were common military rations and a jug of water. Diving the rations into portions he decided he could stretch the food to last him three days, four if he was very lenient. But that's of course if he wanted to eat everyday. Which he judged he wouldn't want to by peering around him. Ocean, ocean, ocean, but wait what's that?! Oh more ocean. Emilio had remembered his instructor quacking about the body being able to last several weeks without food, so his concern right now wasn't the food. It was his water supply.
Whoever sent him on this journey must have had intentions on poor Emilio dying, because with this petty amount of water, life was going to be a struggle. "No compass, no anything, just food and water." In that moment he felt all hope was lost. It hadn't been a single day, a single hour, barely a single minute, and he was already feeling defeated. "I'm gonna die . . ." A sharp pain had manifested itself in his chest, but his moment was abruptly interrupted. A thump almost tipped his whole raft. Then another and another. The wooden floaty creaked and cried with each hit, alerting Emilio it couldn't take much more of this ill directed punishment. This abuse needed to stop right away then.
Obviously the source of these attacks was an aquatic being with a decent mass. But what kind of being. He had no clue what to guess. Making the clone seal, the copy phased into the empty space on the raft. Gripping the handle of the kunai previously plunged in, it dove under the waters. He would use the clones ability to transfer intel, to get a physical scan on the beast. If it was possible he could even kill it now and then. The bubbles cleared and the clone peered at the beast. It was making its way around for another bump into the boat. It was fairly large, but also abstract. It had limbs to grab, along with it's monstrous row of dentures. "A shark and human hybrid?!" The copy of Emilio thought while swimming away from the aquatic mutant. Obviously out speeding the monster in the water wouldn't work, but luring it from underneath the boat to near the surface could help.
Withdrawing a kunai of his own, Emilio prepared to engage the beast. The boat rocked violently as the monster made its way under towards the clone. Emilio easily lost his footing. The wood was soaked and the shuddering and tipping boat wasn't helping. Into the water he went. The cold chilled his very spine and his nerves shocked his body. The salt was light, but it still dug into his mouth and into his cut. The sash piece around his hand was tight, but of course it would soak in water.
Paddling in a panic to the surface, he could careless about his clone. It was an expendable force, but this shark thing would surely kill him in a moments notice. Breaking the brisk cool surface of the water mass, he hoisted his water logged frame up. Using the support of the ropes that tied the logs together built to made the raft, he found the task not that hard or expending. Forming two clones in a heart beat to buy time, he then removed his shirt and pants. Getting sick at sea surely wouldn't help him and know one was watching so why not. Now in a tight garb of black under armor or bicycle shorts, Emilio planned revenge.
His first clone flinched and winced, as the blunt headed beast closed in. One final desperate, but valiant action was made. Holding his kunai forward in fear and in minor foresight. Not only would it inflict a pesky wound to the thick skinned brute, but it would also savor the kunai. If the clone was simply dispersed the kunai would sink into the depths of the ocean, but now it was accessible for others, being his clones, to use.
The shark hybrid would become enraged, but also influenced by a blood crazed spirit. This spirit being the natural blood lust of a shark, once the scent is released. Not utterly bad, now the beast acted even more primal, but it seems to be moving much faster. Formulating an idea in a quick flash, thanks to the collective power of three joined brains, Emilio started directing his two clones.
One would climb the sail to make its way to the peek. The other would enter the shifting sea, to accompany the monster. At the first glance, the beast was out of sight. The waters weren't clear, but visibility was mutilated in the waters. A faint noise similar to the swishing of a tail or fin, made the clone shift his head directly down. To no avail the mad beast was charging straight at him. In a frenzy of bubble filled paddles, the clone broke the water surface, with a look of sheer terror. Emilio felt for him, but he was just a clone, so the feelings weren't too deep. As the clone began allocating chakra to the soles of his feet and dripping hands to stand on the water the shark had reached him. Breaching the surface as if it were a whale of some sort, the clone positioned on the sails peek took this time to leap at the fiend. Directly above the shark beast, he would aim a foot to meet the snout that housed a kunai. Jamming the metal violently into the aquatic lurkers head, ultimately killing it.
"Well at least I have a bit more food now, better get the body out of the water before it bleeds too much." With a sigh of relief, Emilio wiped his sweat dampened skin and approached the lifeless monster. One poke was given along with no response, surely a good sign. Emilio's clone now out of the water then lent him a hand in pulling the mass onto the raft."Too big dammit." The raft was tipping before the whole frame of the shark like being could even get on the boat. Emilio quickly became even more paranoid than usual. His clone still idle, even the two combined minds couldn't fathom a solution. "Shit I'm gonna die. I still had so much I wanted to do, needed to do. I let my clan down and everyone else too."
He found himself back in the pit of despair, as blood of the shark began polluting, just like sorrow tainted his body. No tears would pour out his eyes however. No not a single liquid droplet. He was raised in a clan of battle hardened warriors and tears were not for the weak, but only for the mourning. And Emilio wasn't about to mourn just yet. Digging deep within himself, he mustered up his psyche and stood tall with a new source of confidence. His clone nodded, then left the teen alone with a plume of whisping smoke.
Digging into the open head of the shark like fiend, he reclaimed his kunai. Covered in thick crimson blood and with particles of flesh and other organs. A repulsive site, but it was the world he lived in. Kill or be killed. Extending his hand into the chill waters of the ocean, he swished his hand around cleaning the blade. "I apologize for claiming your soul, but I thank you for feeding mines. May the great and wondrous deities in the skies bless you and let you be reborn anew." He would pray and honor the beast, before indulging in its flesh. A clan tradition and one kept close to Emilio's heart and greatly valued. His eyes would be closed and his hands would be clasped together, with the kunai pointing upwards.
With his ritual complete, he reeled his hand back and jammed the blade into the lifeless corpse tough flesh. A bit of blood ushered forth, but it was ignored. Emilio only had one goal in mind and that was getting more food and leaving. Now with a decent sized flank of meat dismembered, Emilio washed it in the bloodied sea water. Removing all the bones he said one final quick prayer to the abandoned beast.
Taking one deep breath, he exhaled into a sigh. Stress was bleeding into his body and mind and sadly the sigh did nothing to help. Closing his eyes and soaking in the recent events, he was ready to proceed. He inhaled again, inflating his chest and lungs with salty tasting oxygen, then exhaled, but instead he blew hard Fuuton chakra into the sail, propelling the raft away from the previous scene. He knew he needed to save his strength, but for now getting away from that bloody mess was best. He knew more of those shark beast would eventually wander over and make a bigger mess, a mess he didn't want any part of. He had what he needed, so staying would do him no help anyhow.
About half an hour later, he was now coasting the waters. The sun was setting and the blazing orb hit the water beautifully. Making the sky a mix of peaches and blues, a sight exclusive to Emilio. He enjoyed it as he sat alone on the raft and immediately wished he had someone to share it with. Not a being of romantic interest particularly, just anyone. His heart began to ache and then a single tear hit his lap. He had accepted it. He knew this was the end of his short lived journey and he was mourning. Not even a whole day had passed, but his young mind hadn't possessed the will power for this. A sign of life was no where in sight and a sign of hope was no where in existence. None of his food or water had even been expended and Emilio was already in emotional pieces. Grasping his single kunai, Emilio said a prayer "May the great and wondrous deities in the skies bless you." A sniffle broke his prayer as the tears flowed heavily down his cheeks, wetting his clothing. "And let you be reborn anew." With a single motion of his kunai, he allowed crimson blood the trickle out his neck into the rippling sea water below.
Word Count:2028/2000. Tried to hit 2k on the dot for dramatic effect, but oh well | |
| | | Aionrap
Posts : 100 Join date : 2013-11-24
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Mon Dec 02, 2013 10:24 pm | |
| | |
| | | Corren Admin
Posts : 181 Join date : 2013-11-19 Age : 29 Location : Behind you.
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Tue Dec 03, 2013 9:15 pm | |
| [13:08:18] @ Corren : You can choose if this is Canon or not Canon to the site. [13:10:31] Illya : . [13:10:33] @ Corren : Whether she is your sister or not is up to you. [13:10:40] @ Corren : What happens, what goes wrong. Up to you. [13:10:52] @ Corren : You will be graded on your ability to fill holes, as well as literary prowess. [13:11:03] @ Corren : Now! Go Go Power Rangers! You can do it! [13:11:19] Illya : Its morphing time! [13:11:53] Nikolai Forge : White Ranger, Tiger power [13:12:08] * Corren punches the side of his fist against his shoulder, and is bathed in a flash of light to reveal his entire body covered in plated armour. [13:12:11] @ Corren : Yeah! [13:12:16] * Corren is a f*cking Keyblader [13:12:41] Illya : lol.... [13:12:55] @ Corren : What? I love Kingdom Hearts. [13:12:57] @ Corren : Judge me! [13:13:07] V has been disconnected on Tue Dec 03, 2013 1:13 pm (session timeout) [13:13:12] * Illya judges him [13:13:22] Aionrap : . [13:13:33] * Corren rises above the justice system, and overrules the judge [13:13:41] @ Corren : Ore wa... [13:13:43] @ Corren : ORE WA! [13:13:46] @ QWERTYJEF : . [13:13:46] @ Corren : GUNDAM-U!!! [13:13:47] * Nikolai Forge turns into Gundam. | |
| | | Aionrap
Posts : 100 Join date : 2013-11-24
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Tue Dec 03, 2013 9:32 pm | |
| Your scenario: You meet a girl who calls herself Star. She claims to be your sister, and everything about her fits your memory of your sister. (Just... Go with it. Pretends you have a sister your age who's dead and she matches her perfectly). Whether she is your sister or not is up to you. [13:10:40] @ Corren : What happens, what goes wrong. Up to you. [13:10:52] @ Corren : You will be graded on your ability to fill holes, as well as literary prowess.
Just posting the important details > .>
| |
| | | Aionrap
Posts : 100 Join date : 2013-11-24
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Wed Dec 04, 2013 3:46 am | |
| Lush green grass as far as the eye can see, planted down perfectly by the gods themselves on an also perfectly curved hill. At the top of this hill lived a giant oak tree. There were probably countless amounts of stories behind the vegetation, but the story being told now has no association with it. The sky was dark, cloudless, and moonless, as if the ivory deity had gone on vacation. This location seemingly hidden away from the world and even the moons watchful eyes, was now blessed with an ocean of twinkling stars. Each almost completely distinguishable as they gleamed competitively giving the spectator a wondrous view.
One of the spectators this cool windless night would be Emilio Nagasaki. He laid in the soft full grass and allowed it to cradle his frame ever so gently. His bandage wrapped hands would find their way behind his powder blue hair to caress his head, so he could drown in the glimmering starry depths. No noise, just him and the breath taking view, until something quite odd happened.
As if spawning from the universe of stars itself, a new, but familiar frame flopped herself down into the grassy meadow. She was right beside Emilio, who would stare with wide eyes as deep as the nebula he was previously gazing at. "Hey Emilio, it's been awhile hasn't it?" Out of words, out of saliva to wet his throat and mouth, out of beats for his very heart. "St-Star! I thought you were- wait. Where have you been?!" His young athletic frame was now sitting up, slightly leaning towards his sister. Sporting his same soft hair except it was violet, she would lift both shoulders in a shrug. "Don't shrug whe-."He was cut off as she stood and took off running. He wasn't in a chasing mood, he had only been enjoying the breath taking starlight, but this was a special occasion.
"Dammit." He mumbled under his breath, leaping to his feet. His sister was well known for playing too much, but this was for exceeding that title. Dashing down the hill, careful to gauge his speed so he wouldn't fall, Emilio was barely keeping up. Yes the stars were out lighting the sky, but they didn't gleam enough to illuminate the field and with the moon not present, the only thing he could follow was a silhouette. The grass brushing beneath his feet he closed in, but it was too late.
The duo had made it to the hill's foot and now were entering the forest. He came to an abrupt stop, ruining some of the healthy grass below his footing. With the lack of light, he would have to tread carefully and rely on his ears, he couldn't let her get away. "Star stop playing around, this is serious!" His vocal chords ached as his shout echoed throughout the sleeping forest.
The shout was unanswered and he could tell Star continued deeper into the forest upon hearing her rustle through the leaves. His chest rose as he inhaled deeply, then deflated reciprocating the action. Irritated and emotionally strained were two words to lightly describe what the typically vibrant teen was feeling. Picking up a careful brisk jog, Emilio formed the clone seal, conjuring up ten perfect replica's that came equipped with voices, shadows, tangibility, and all.
No audible communication was essential, only the collective nod of heads as they scattered throughout the forest. Each however, would travel by land, not daring to take to the trees. With the drastic cut on visibility, traveling through the tree tops, could easily render one unconscious with an abrupt collision, so how was it that Star was having little to no difficulty? As he and his armada of clones foraged throughout the dense forest, the thoughts troubled him.
"She-she was dead . . . I know she was, I saw it with my own eyes. But here she is, how is-." A frustrated grunt broke his thought process, it was all so confusing. Emilio was present when she was killed in a horrific hunting accident, but somehow he was finding himself chasing her at this very moment.
"Dammit . . . Kai!" He formed the tiger seal, sending a sharp measure of chakra through his system, but to no avail. This was real, no genjutsu was broken, and that thought alone made his psyche tremble.
"Star listen . . . please stop, just . . ." At this point Emilio's voice was cracking on the verge of tears. He wasn't in the mood for games, but why couldn't she understand that? Was it not natural for a human to long for another . . . a sibling? Her delicate frame barely visible by her signature violet air turned and chuckle to him. "It's just like old times Emilio, playing hide and seek in the forest." The innocent sentence, was enough to throw him into a state of nostalgia.
A bright summer afternoon and in the company of many other childhood friends. Everyone was happy and smiling, the feeling was warm, just like beating sun. She was there too, his sister. Back when she was still alive and always smiling. "Ahg" He broke out of his trance to find his nose trailing a crimson liquid and him on his ass. He muttered a curse under his breath to the tree, though he was at fault for his misfortune.
His well trained blood hounds for clones, were still hot on her trail however, meaning he wasn't out yet. Gathering himself to a stand, he found one of his loyal hounds had stayed behind after seeing the brutal hit. A nod of understanding was shared and together they took off.
His eyes finally accustomed to the darkness of the moonless night, the trees large frames had become more defined and he could easily discern the openings in the forest. One clone, who could be described as a fragment of Emilio's courage, had took the high route in the tree tops, as the others followed on the barren but patchy earth. One confident leap transformed into a tackle and Emilio winced as his sister touched down to the ground. She was his sister however, so her impact was cushioned by using two clones who then poofed into smoke as pillows.
The soldier of courage and valor still grasping her tight, like if they were siblings wrestling again, Emilio approached. His nose had stopped trickling and he peered into his sisters poorly lit face to notice a horrendous fact."Sta- Star, you haven't aged. . . You haven't aged at all, what happened?" His aggressive blood hounds grip was released, as Emilio grasped her shoulders. They were exactly how he remembered, but they lacked warmth. No heat was perceivable, only a body of his now much younger sister.
"Well it seems my time is up. It was nice playing with you again Emilio." His hands phased through her body, as it turned translucent and spectral. "Wait what?! Star wait!"" Her body now ascending to the stars themselves, she waved and left him in the company of his eight clones and in the company of his now sporadic thoughts.
WordCount: 1189/1000 | |
| | | Aionrap
Posts : 100 Join date : 2013-11-24
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Fri Dec 06, 2013 6:35 pm | |
| Completion bump | |
| | | Corren Admin
Posts : 181 Join date : 2013-11-19 Age : 29 Location : Behind you.
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess Sun Dec 08, 2013 6:14 am | |
| Sorry for the wait. You've Advanced to Chunin. Congratulations! You have met the expectations and exceeded others. I'm happy to announce the newest Chunin, Aionrap. | |
| | | Sponsored content
| Subject: Re: I Declare I guess | |
| |
| | | | I Declare I guess | |
|
Similar topics | |
|
| Permissions in this forum: | You cannot reply to topics in this forum
| |
| |
| |
|